Woman Erased Intro
Woman Erased (Intro to my upcoming book)
For Women Who Dare to Grow Older and Reclaim the Dignity of that Honor
Our Memoir, Our Truth, Our Reclamation, Our Legacy
By Meg McCraken
I raced headstrong into my 40s, but grew through those early years to soften sweetly on the edges. Deep exhales of surrender led me to a treasured authenticity that I have been longing for ever since I left the audacious nature of my childhood self. Settling now into the very soul of my life, a more subtle wisdom wants to finally give voice to the simple truths: what it means to be human, fallible, beautiful, finite and infinite all at once. And the importance of: presence, integrity, forgiveness, relationships, generosity, and most of all listening well.
As I grow beyond the infancy of wanting to become somebody IN this world, I am learning to allow myself to be something OF and TO this world. Shifting from what I can get to how I can give is such a natural and easy progression, the same way summer slips like a whisper into fall. I am tenacious in a completely different way. Hungry for a new mode of being with myself, on this earth and together, with all others, in this life. My radicalized individualism has melted, as old righteousness fades into a longing for deeper understanding and true connection.
I am excited about turning 50 and what lies beyond. I am humbly working my way through the tough initiation of menopause. Embracing the hot flashes and mood swings, surrendering over and over again so that I can extract the nectar from this process, and laughing a lot at the hundreds of times I have forgotten why the hell I went upstairs. Really, I’m cultivating patience, or perhaps it’s cultivating me.
The lines on my face tell the intimate story of a life well-lived. Of all the days wind whipped and sun stroked by the wild and mighty brush of the mountains. Of the water of my tears and a love so powerful it has carved beautiful canyons out of all of my losses. Of an unreasonable joy that shatters, like fireworks, from the corners of my eyes.
I am truly proud of the woman that I continue to become. But oddly, this world is not up to celebrate the elegance of my increasing sophistication. And so, I begin to slowly fade away. Becoming invisible, another woman erased.
But something in me refuses to hide, to yield to the myth of my diminishing worth. In the midst of a world that insists that aging is somehow a problem to solve, my wizening spirit has the audacity to celebrate. It’s wildly good, all of these ways that life has carved my body, my mind, and my heart into an elaborate living masterpiece. Ringed like a great sequoia, grooved and layered like a mighty canyon, sketched daily by the wind into a new expression like a sand dune in the desert, full and raucous like the ocean – it’s brilliant. So no, I will not erase the intricate ways in which I am being etched and carved into hallowed time. I will instead hold myself up as a rare and refined piece of art and walk into all of my days in awe of the beautiful ways that life continues to mold, bend, break and create me.
As I take off these masks of fear and doubt that have been suffocating the woman I am meant to become, it’s dazzling. For here; behind, before, and all around me now, a rebellion of stunningly radiant women wait with madly open hearts, beyond the shame, in all their glory. It’s a welcoming beyond what I could have ever possibly imagined.
Completely unfiltered and undone, I dare to step into this sacred circle and lay claim to the rest of the life that was meant for me. I dare to dismantle the paradigm that tells us that the signs of our aging are ugly. I refuse to uphold the impossible standard of forever young. A futile effort that lines the pockets of a few with gold, and distracts us from the sheer power of the grace of our years. I dare to unearth the truth of how we have been erasing women for thousands of years in hundreds of ways. I dare to call my elders out of hiding and put them at the center so that we may all learn, grow, and marvel at the poise and wisdom of such exclusively full lives.
Now sister, I dare you to join me. To help me to tell our story with courage, so that we may continue to create a new landscape for the great great granddaughters yet to come. For, we are stronger and wiser when we can laugh and cry and celebrate the preciousness of our lives together. And Brother, I dare you to understand and to honor us – the women who will not be erased. For when we can celebrate ourselves and our truth, I promise, we will all find our way back to each other.